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One of the hardest things in the world of film making is the dreaded tech mishap. I woke up this morning, early for me, only to find my laptop not turning on. The laptop with all the footage of my latest skit on it. As well as the script for the next skit and the first chapter for the new issue of Warzone Tales.
It is beyond stressful and can really knock you off your game sometimes. But I think I managed to fix it. It only cost me like a half hour of my time. Sometimes stuff likes this makes you want to scream. But you can't allow events like this to hold you down. You have to shake it off and figure out how to do what needs to be done, even with the setbacks in place. That is part of what makes someone a great director. P.S. I fixed my laptop, thank God! Sometimes you wake up in the morning and just feel blah. You don't have any energy or inspiration to make anything. But and this is the important thing, you can't let that stop you from making stuff.
It is easy to write, film, edit, or do anything else you want to do when you feel that burst of inspiration. That isn't what builds your voice and your craft. In order to do that, you have to be able to create inspiration for yourself. There are many different ways to do that, and they are different for everyone, you just have to find the ones that work for you. The two ways that always seem to work for me is to A) just do it. Write, film, whatever. Once I start the ideas start flowing and more and more ideas come faster and faster. I just have to force myself to put those first words down, or to film that first shot and the rest just builds on that momentum. The second trick I have is to go out into the world. Go hang out with your friends, go on an adventure. It doesn't have to be something crazy, just something fun. Put yourself out there into the world and let real life inspire you. Because let's be honest, nothing in the world of fiction is as crazy and unbelievable as the shit you see in the real world. I hope no one out there ever lets the real world tear you down. I believe in you guys. As I get older I start to see how pointless the pursuit of success is. Or at least what I use to think of as success. All I ever wanted was to be in the limelight, have fame and money, now I wanted that so I could fund my own projects. That has always been my main goal, to write and create worlds, and in order to do that, well you need money, or at least people who will give you money. So that is what I went after. But that is backwards. You don't chase the rewards so you can do the art. You chase the art and hope that the rewards come.
It's a hard thing to understand when you live paycheck to paycheck. When money is needed for simple things like rent and food. But going after your goals, without stressing about the outcome is the only way to feel truly happy. If only the world worked like that. Most of us aren't that lucky. We have to find ways to make ends meet while we work at our craft, knowing that the odds of us achieving our goals are stacked against us. It makes me miss being a child, when you could work at it, without having to worry about what will come out of it. As we get older, that freedom vanishes and we are forced to deal with the pressures of the real world. I'm not sure what made me write this today, just some thoughts that were rolling through my head. There is a path to making the art you want and making a living. I just haven't found it yet. The goal is to find it. Pure and simple. I hope all of you do the same. Till next time, Give Us Legends! Do you ever think about what the future holds? Go for long walks and think about how you want your life to turn out? Sometimes I think I spend far too much time doing that. On the other hand it helps motivate me. Even when I start to feel down and question if I am on the right path, my long walks thinking about how I want my life to turn out keep me going. Motivates me to double down and try harder. To keep working towards my goals no matter what.
Lately I've been talking to friends who have opinions that I just can't understand and I can't help but wonder if these long walks are the reasons why. I have one friends who is of the viewpoint that when you feel down you can't pull yourself out of the funk on your own. A notion that I find downright scary. The thought that you need someone else, or something else in order to feel happy. Happiness doesn't come from outside, it comes from inside. It is something you work and strive for. It's a state of being that you have to decide to want. And you have to want it so bad that you move heaven and earth to find it. You don't always make it, but the effort is apart of life, and no one ever said life was easy. That brings us to what my other friend said. That happiness doesn't exist. It is not a real thing and no one is ever happy. What a sad thought, one that I don't believe, nor can I understand how anyone could. If you look for things in life to ruin your mood, or make you unhappy you will find it. The world is a dark cruel place, no one is saying otherwise, but there is also a lot of beauty in the world if you look hard enough. They say when you are single all you see are people in relationships, and when you are in a relationship all you see is single people. There is a reason for this, and it is not that everyone is the opposite of you, you damn egotistical maniac. It's because we as a species have this crazy notion stuck in our heads that the grass is always greener on the other side. Add that to the fact that brain finds whatever we are looking for, even if we don't consciously know we are looking for it. I guess what I'm getting at is, if you believe that you can't be happy on your own, if at all, than you are right. If on the other hand, you believe that you can find happiness inside of yourself, than you are also right. It is all what you choose to believe. Choose happiness, you'll be glad you did. Sleep has never been something that makes a lot of sense to me. When I sleep for 3 or 4 hours I feel wide awake. Like I can do anything in the world. When I sleep 6-8 hours I wake up with horrible headaches and feel like I'm going to die. Why is sleep so confusing and complicated? Or is it just me?
I used to wake up after 4 hours, now I'm lucky if I wake up before 10 hours. Maybe I should invest in an alarm or something, because this is getting ridiculous. I'm going to have to start looking into ways of sleeping shorter amounts of time so I feel more awake, which just saying out loud makes me feel crazy. But alas, that is where I'm at in my life at this moment. Am I the only one who has such a messed up relationship with sleep? For the longest time I obsessed over working nonstop on every project I had in front of me. Whenever I would go hang out with friends or read, or play games I would stress out. Like really stress out. All I would be able to think about was all the work I wasn't doing. It made my life a lot harder than it needed to be and let me miss out on a lot of good times that I should have enjoyed more.
There was another added drawback. It became harder and harder for me to come out with story ideas. The problem was I was burning through all the ideas I had. I needed new experiences in order to continue being creative. I started going out with friends and attempted to live in the moment. As I did so, I started to overflow with ideas again. It was a reawakening for me. Sometimes in order to create you have to take a step back and have fun. It's a hard lesson, but one I needed to learn. |
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