So this past week I was on set. Not of one of my projects, that will come soon, or even of a friends. This was a new set, with a new crew. Like I said in an old post, I was nervous of showing up. I've been battling depression for the past few years. I've been more or less running away from all creative endeavors. Not because I wanted too, but because I was living in fear.
So, how did it go being on set again? It felt great. I felt alive for the first time in years. I felt almost like myself again. This is what I needed, what I want more of. I'm going to find the old Jonathan, and enjoy some of the fun that he used to love so much. Life is short, let's enjoy it.
One week from today I'll be stepping foot onto a set for the first time in a long time. Now I've filmed some stuff for myself these past couple of years, and I've filmed some shows and concerts since then, but not a film set. Not a narrative, not someone else's in a long long time.
It's a weird feeling going back to that world, and part of me is so nervous. Although, to be fair, I've never done anything like this before. Normally when I work on other people's projects, it's behind the scenes. It's helping to make it behind the scenes. My roles in front of the camera in other people's projects tend to be small roles, supporting roles, or in projects made by friends. On this project I know only one person. The DP, a good friend of mine and the only reason I agreed to work on this project.
I'm hoping this is a good, fun experience that ends with us having a fun movie, but at the same time, I'm just glad to be going back into the world. Since Winter Solstice I've withdrawn from the world. I've stopped trying to create art. It's time I get back into it. It's time I stop hiding from the world.
I'm going to be actor, and only an actor in a movie for the first time and I'm excited. I'm going to do everything I can to make it as great as I possibly can and use that momentum to get my projects moving again.
The Complete history of Blueroof Productions!