As I walk down the halls of North Lake and remember all the times I've had here, both good and bad, I can't help but get hit with the realization that I've been here far too long. Now to be fair, I have left and came back and did other things. I haven't been here non-stop but still it has been far too long. I feel washed up. As if I am wasting my potential. Wasting my very life in the pursuit of nothing.
Where am I going? Why am I going there? What am I doing to get there? All questions that I do not as of yet, have the answers to. I'm lost out in sea with land no where in sight. On Facebook this morning I read a post that my second cousin only 18 is about to get both his 3rd and 4th degrees. I couldn't be more proud of him but at the same time it just makes me look at my own life and wonder where I went wrong? How did I mess it up so badly? Is there any hope for me left? Can I still have a happy fulfilled life or did I miss my chance?
I guess only tomorrow can tell us. Only tomorrow can see what our hard work today leads too, and maybe, just maybe that is for the best. Who knows? All I know, really, is that I can't give up. No matter how long it takes me or how far behind the rest of the world I get, I know who I am and what I want to do and that is all I can do. Nothing else matters. Not really.
Jonathan Gutheinz vents about everything under the sun.